Right now, I’m feeling a mix of things. It’s already been a crazy week and I would’ve easily said that Monday. Let me start by saying, I had a fabulous vacation with people I enjoy doing things with. Things I’ve rarely had the opportunity to do in my life. A group of us rented a cabin in North Carolina for a week. The views, fresh air, and company were spectacular. I really think I learned something about how I feel about the woods, wilderness, etc. It really makes you feel alive. We hiked a few miles out on the Appalachian Trail…which was the coolest thing I’ve done in quite a while. It’s a strange thing that happens to a person as they are hiking up very steep terrain…you begin to take it in and respect in such a way that your body remembers how much you have in common with the earth beneath your feet. It’s exhilarating. My only regret is that we didn’t hike longer and further. Add in some fishing, mountain biking, more hiking and white water rafting – you can begin to see how this was easily an adventure week with friends.
On the car ride home Sunday, I realized how lucky I am to have had these experiences in the days prior. Gratefulness just flooded my soul. Monday, I would return to work exhausted, happy with stories to accompany the wounds and bruises from my adventures.
Monday afternoon, my vehicle was t-boned by a young man, who skidded through a red light. He is ok and I am fine as well. It makes one think…a) I have so so much to be grateful for…experiences, good friends, insurance…MY LIFE. b) What are you trying to teach me God? What did I miss?
I must say I think I handled it pretty well. I took the approach that no one is hurt and things happen. It was a fairly good attitude.
And then, I faltered. I mean actually it was Murphy’s Law-ish. If something could go wrong it would go wrong, however, since I’m being honest, Murphy had nothing to do with it. I made a poor choice. You see when you’re fortunate enough to have people who love you and care about you, they like to know you’re ok after a potentially life threatening event. I wasn’t as sensitive to that as I should have been, and a few other things that I’m confident I couldn’t explain right now (I plead muscle relaxer). But the thing I’m most grateful for are those wonderful people who love me so well…to the point that I sometimes don’t think I deserve it.
So a few take-a-ways:
- Go to the mountains. GET OUTSIDE.
- You can have a fabulous vacation and come back to something hard, inconvenient, or potentially fatal. LIFE DOES NOT STOP OR CARE HOW GRATEFUL YOU FEEL.
- Just because you are extremely well-loved and return that love fiercely doesn’t mean you won’t screw up and hurt someone. LOVE DOESN’T AUTOMATICALLY MAKE YOU A GREAT DECISION MAKER. ONE MUST CONTINUALLY WORK AT IT.
- In the midst of all this dating is hard.
- Muscle relaxers rule!
So, forgive yourself for the things you’ve done, be grateful for every breath and moment, and love those dear to you for tomorrow is not promised. And put one foot in front of the other and climb again.